Narcissus

By: Hanna



It was but a myth – nothing else. Narcissus was not real; I am not his shadow in any way, shape or form.

I don’t know why; I refuse to assume pathetic emotions or accept the fact I slept with myself. I can see Diabound’s dark eyes on me, the same as they were when he found out about it – I wanted to hurt him. I never intended to take it as far as I did, but there were things he’d obviously kept from me.

I resorted to my other self for comfort, crazy as it sounds. He’s my opposite in a myriad of ways; attempting to count them entirely would be futile. When I first encountered him, upon my discovery of this ‘livejournal’, the initial thing I noticed about my ‘other me’ was that he is driven tirelessly by sex.

This was alarming in more than one way, as you’d assume.

As another annoyance, it was as though he was attached to the hip of the pharaoh – his so-called ‘best friend’, if such things exist. You could imagine my reaction: I was aghast. Why was another version of Malik Ishtar sleeping with the othermeDiabound-stealing!fucker pharaoh?

Believe me, it was enough to make me hack up a lung with my incessant choking-on-strawberry-moment. Don’t ask how I got the damned thing out.

So, things progressed, and I noticed other me becoming… a sap, to put it in the crudest of forms. It seemed that he’d begun a fling-of-sorts with the thief, Bakura’s, vessel – now, as odd as it may seem, this runt’s been in all kinds of shit. Something about gods, Texas, cacti, and a whole lot of freaking angst.

It takes up three-quarters of my friends’ list on a daily basis – pain in the ass, tch.

The kid’s yami and my other self are obviously both after the kid, because other me never shuts up about Ryou – honestly, the entire love deal makes me sick.

Back to my original point: I find it strange to be attracted to myself; in some ways, it seems sinful, but at times, it feels right, like I’m just expressing some of that ‘self-love’ I’ve heard him prattle on about.

The only things I’m getting out of sleeping with a hornier version of myself is sex, to incite jealousy from Diabound, and get revenge against the nameless pharaoh. You don’t become attached to yourself – that would be conceited.

I couldn’t get any more absorbed in myself.